a perfectionist's weakness

It's hard to learn that one is imperfect; that one cannot achieve everything that one sets out to do because of human limits.

Throughout history, various people reacted differently to their limitations. Some become idealists, like Karl Marx, who created an almost scientific theory to explain the perfect utopian state he had in mind. Others become extremists, like Romantic pianist Schumann, who attempted to cut the skin in between his fingers so that he could stretch his hands over more keys. Or the suicide bombers we hear of every day; creating chaos in the name of their religion.

Few of us realise that they did it to deny their state of poverty and to put their energy into seemingly more heroic causes. But how heroic can one be, when the basis of doing so is to run away from your weakness?

Maybe it's hard to face a bleak future - yes it is, and I understand. But to turn idealistic and extremist at the expense of others might be a very selfish solution. Maybe there's a 'third way' out of this...? Another state of mind, before the state of acceptance?

I might have found it. But it's essentially nothing. Feeling nothing. Seeing nothing. Looking nowhere. Heading nowhere. It's a state of 'om', maybe.

It's essentially nothing; really.